In long-term relationships, the monotony of life often prevails over the feelings of partners for each other. “I love them, but I am not attracted” is the most popular problem of couples who have been together for a long time. Fortunately, you can get back this amazing feeling of unity in relationships, the main thing is to adequately set priorities and be ready to make efforts. Here are some important steps that will help you fall in love with your partner again.
- Be realistic
Talking about infatuation, many people want to return emotions that overwhelmed them at the beginning of the relationship, experience that thrill and excitement again when they meet their partners on https://ru-brides.com/women.html. However, it is worth remembering that your life was completely different at that moment. You did not know yet about each other’s annoying habits and how it feels to share life with this person. You met rarely, and therefore, you missed each other more. You did not know each other so well, that’s why everything seemed less predictable. Perhaps, global life circumstances have changed for this time, and you cannot just turn a blind eye to all these factors, forget everything that you know about each other and return “those same” feelings. Many specialists say that falling in love is only a stage of rapprochement between two people, it will pass, and this is normal. However, it can be replaced by a deeper and more stable feeling that is worth striving for it.
- Set priorities in the relationships
In a long-term relationship, people lose their excitement and newness but get comfort and confidence in return. It is important to focus not on the things you have lost but on what you’ve got, this will help take a fresh look at your priorities in relationships. Your relationship is affected by daily activities and major life events: career, caring for children or aging parents. All this can shift the focus of attention and move you apart. To prevent this, you should pay conscious efforts. Strengthening your intimacy should be one of your life priorities. Intentionally create moments in which you can be together. Regularly set aside time for communication, this can be a regular exchange of news or a date. Talk about your needs so as not to accumulate resentment and irritation.
- Be solicitous towards your life
Sometimes it is useful to detach yourself from everything and look at the partner and your relationship as if from outside. You may find out that you haven’t done anything that gives you both pleasure for a long time. Previous habits and ways to enjoy each other have been replaced with household chores, and then you just forgot about them. Bring back the good that was in your relationship, even if it’s just a habit of chatting before going to bed.
- Understand your true feelings
Find out exactly what you would like to change in your relationship: is it a physical aspect, emotional, or both? Often, a more serious grudge is hidden behind dissatisfaction with some moment in a relationship. Minor disappointments, refusals, misunderstanding contribute to the feeling that you no longer love your partner as before. Being in love means a feeling of a perfect mind meld, so try to work out your differences to get closer.
- Talk about the problem in a positive way
It is difficult to admit to a partner that your feelings are not the same as before, and your relationship needs doping. To avoid such a conversation as a signal to break up, try to focus on the result that you want to achieve. Say, “I have to share my emotional state because I want us to get closer.” Thus, it will be easier for a partner to treat your words positively.
- Remember who you fell in love with
Try to make a list of the partner’s strong qualities. In times of crisis, when they seem unattractive, negative, annoying and behave incorrectly, remind yourself that this does not make them a bad person in general, and there are qualities worthy of love and respect. If you feel that the partner has changed, try to understand why. Perhaps they are not happy and have not loved themselves for a long time. Then it’s worth not pushing the person away, but to find out what is happening to them and remind them that they are not alone.
- Start now
You can spice up the relationship no matter how long you have been together, but it is better not to delay solving problems. Often people ignore resentment and misunderstanding in a relationship. However, in the long run, this can lead to a much more global crisis than an unpleasant conversation that you are trying to avoid now.